Saturday, April 26, 2003

What a Week

I was working for a while as a GameMaster (Admin) of an online roleplaying game called Gemstone III. It's a game I've played since like '95, way back when it was a game on AOL. Anyway, this site is not a GS-related site at all, so I haven't talked about GS.. up until today, because on Monday, for the first time in my life, I was fired.

Yes, that's right, I was fired from a game. And what tops the cake is that I was basically fired over a technicality after I had the grandfather of all brainfarts and slipped up. I was a casualty of a much-bigger problem, but I was essentially fired for violating my NDA. In any case, I'm still trying to get over the shock of the whole thing. From what I know of past people who have been fired, I figured it takes a lot. Guess I was wrong. Ha!

I'm now a regular player after almost three years of being staff in some capacity. Regular account, no nifty tools or perks. It's very bizarre. I rather like it, though. It's kind of freeing, to not be held to any real standard anymore, to not HAVE to do anything, to play when I want and do whatever the hell I want. I mean, when I look at it, it's not really like I lost anything. Yeah, I wanted to be a GM really bad for quite a long time, but I did get the opportunity, and it also didn't hold up to what I'd expected it to be.

I'd been considering quitting anyway about once a week, but it was kind of like the more work they piled on me, the deeper I got myself. It made it harder to quit, knowing all the work I would be dumping on people. Well, they took the decision away from me, but maybe that's okay. I certainly wasn't going to make it for myself.. and do I miss all the work, the deadlines, the complete lack of gratification and appreciation? No. What I miss are the perks and fun stuff, and that's not any reason to be a GM.

So I think overall, it's not a bad thing. It's just kind of disheartening to be fired when you've been working really hard. But it's a friggin' game and I know I'll get over it because, in the grand scheme, I'm headed for bigger and better things anyway. And I did get a great opportunity.

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